Post by Republic on Sept 24, 2007 21:25:19 GMT
"Bosco is a Bollox! Bosco is a Bollox!" What Zig and Zag were caught
shouting (with Ian Dempsey laughing in the background) when the cameras
returned prematurely from a commercial break during 'Dempsey's Den'. Zag
was tossing the Bosco puppet around.
Ian Dempsey: "What would you give Andrew and Sarah as a wedding present?"
Caller: "I'd love to give Fergie AIDS and put a bomb up Andy's hole'"
"Stephen Roche, the only British or Irish cyclist to win the Tour De France."
ITV commentator.
Larry Gogan: "With what town in Britain is Shakespeare associated?"
Contestant: "Hamlet."
Larry Gogan: "Name the BBC's Grand Prix commentator? .... I'll give you a
hint. It's something you suck...."
Contestant: "Oh, DickieDavies." (Murray Walker is the correct answer).
Larry Gogan: "What was Jeeve's occupation?"
Contestant: "He was a carpenter."
Larry Gogan: "Complete this well known phrase. 'As happy as.....' hint
think of me."
Contestant: "Flies on sh1te."
Larry Gogan: (after a caller got none of 18 questions right on the Just a
Minute quiz) - "Ah sure the questions didn't really suit you did they?"
Caller: "Ah go fuck off Larry you're only an old bollox."
Gerry Ryan: (during a discussion on whether people would like to be buried
or cremated when they die) - "Would you like to be buried or cremated?"
Caller: "Oh, buried Gerry."
Gerry Ryan: "And where would you like to be buried?"
Caller: "Up to me balls in Bibi Baskin!"
"When I said they'd scored two goals, of course I meant they'd scored one."
RTE Commentator George Hamilton
"That mail used to be handled by hand, now it's handled manually."
Chief Executive of An Post, John Hines.
"The referendum went as most people hoped it would."
Irish Times editorial displaying acute understanding of the Democratic
Process.
"Clap your feet!"
Bernie of the Nolan Sisters.
"British Army bomb disposal squads who attempt to defuse carbombs early and
before areas are properly evacuated will be responsible for endangering
civilian lives."
IRA statement 1988.
"He's pulling him off. The Spanish manager is pulling his Captain off!"
George Hamilton as Butreguanio comes off against Ireland.
"The idea is well and good in theory, but tell me this, who is going to
feed them?"
Wicklow Councillor objects to a proposal to boost tourism by putting
gondolas on Blessington Lake.
"We are not prepared to stand idly by and be murdered in our beds."
Rev. Ian Paisley.
"Deep down I'm a very shallow person." Charles Haughey.
"I'm always suspicious of games where you're the only ones that play it."
Jack Charlton on hurling.
"Outside HIV in Grafton Street."
Gay Byrne plugging Hot House Flowers appearance.
CONCERNED RAPIST WORE A CONDOM
Evening Herald
RAPIST: I THOUGHT SHE WAS MY WIFE
Star
MAN KEPT ARMS UNDER BED AFTER RELATIVE'S DEATH
Irish Times
DEAD MAN INJURED IN CRASH
Irish Times
Interviewer: Is it not dangerous to sell people knives called Rambo Knives?
Shopkeeper: I wouldn't say so, a lot of them can't spell.
Jim Mitchell TD: You're always mixing me up with someone else.
Ceann Comhairle, Joe Brennan: Yes, I'm always confusing you with that
fellow Mitchell.
"Ludicrous. Ridiculous."
1989 edition of Collins Concise Dictionary defines the word 'Irish'.
"Get married again."
Charles Haughey to women asking for an increase in the widows' pension.
Irish Indo after the Gardai raided a massage parlor (knocking shop) in
Rathmines. This is the arresting Garda's testimony: "When we entered the
premises the defendant was naked and in an aroused state. When asked the
reason for his presence at the establishment, he said he was being treated
for a GAA injury."
Job Application Form: Do you support the overthrow of the Government by
force, subversion or violence?
Applicant: Violence.
shouting (with Ian Dempsey laughing in the background) when the cameras
returned prematurely from a commercial break during 'Dempsey's Den'. Zag
was tossing the Bosco puppet around.
Ian Dempsey: "What would you give Andrew and Sarah as a wedding present?"
Caller: "I'd love to give Fergie AIDS and put a bomb up Andy's hole'"
"Stephen Roche, the only British or Irish cyclist to win the Tour De France."
ITV commentator.
Larry Gogan: "With what town in Britain is Shakespeare associated?"
Contestant: "Hamlet."
Larry Gogan: "Name the BBC's Grand Prix commentator? .... I'll give you a
hint. It's something you suck...."
Contestant: "Oh, DickieDavies." (Murray Walker is the correct answer).
Larry Gogan: "What was Jeeve's occupation?"
Contestant: "He was a carpenter."
Larry Gogan: "Complete this well known phrase. 'As happy as.....' hint
think of me."
Contestant: "Flies on sh1te."
Larry Gogan: (after a caller got none of 18 questions right on the Just a
Minute quiz) - "Ah sure the questions didn't really suit you did they?"
Caller: "Ah go fuck off Larry you're only an old bollox."
Gerry Ryan: (during a discussion on whether people would like to be buried
or cremated when they die) - "Would you like to be buried or cremated?"
Caller: "Oh, buried Gerry."
Gerry Ryan: "And where would you like to be buried?"
Caller: "Up to me balls in Bibi Baskin!"
"When I said they'd scored two goals, of course I meant they'd scored one."
RTE Commentator George Hamilton
"That mail used to be handled by hand, now it's handled manually."
Chief Executive of An Post, John Hines.
"The referendum went as most people hoped it would."
Irish Times editorial displaying acute understanding of the Democratic
Process.
"Clap your feet!"
Bernie of the Nolan Sisters.
"British Army bomb disposal squads who attempt to defuse carbombs early and
before areas are properly evacuated will be responsible for endangering
civilian lives."
IRA statement 1988.
"He's pulling him off. The Spanish manager is pulling his Captain off!"
George Hamilton as Butreguanio comes off against Ireland.
"The idea is well and good in theory, but tell me this, who is going to
feed them?"
Wicklow Councillor objects to a proposal to boost tourism by putting
gondolas on Blessington Lake.
"We are not prepared to stand idly by and be murdered in our beds."
Rev. Ian Paisley.
"Deep down I'm a very shallow person." Charles Haughey.
"I'm always suspicious of games where you're the only ones that play it."
Jack Charlton on hurling.
"Outside HIV in Grafton Street."
Gay Byrne plugging Hot House Flowers appearance.
CONCERNED RAPIST WORE A CONDOM
Evening Herald
RAPIST: I THOUGHT SHE WAS MY WIFE
Star
MAN KEPT ARMS UNDER BED AFTER RELATIVE'S DEATH
Irish Times
DEAD MAN INJURED IN CRASH
Irish Times
Interviewer: Is it not dangerous to sell people knives called Rambo Knives?
Shopkeeper: I wouldn't say so, a lot of them can't spell.
Jim Mitchell TD: You're always mixing me up with someone else.
Ceann Comhairle, Joe Brennan: Yes, I'm always confusing you with that
fellow Mitchell.
"Ludicrous. Ridiculous."
1989 edition of Collins Concise Dictionary defines the word 'Irish'.
"Get married again."
Charles Haughey to women asking for an increase in the widows' pension.
Irish Indo after the Gardai raided a massage parlor (knocking shop) in
Rathmines. This is the arresting Garda's testimony: "When we entered the
premises the defendant was naked and in an aroused state. When asked the
reason for his presence at the establishment, he said he was being treated
for a GAA injury."
Job Application Form: Do you support the overthrow of the Government by
force, subversion or violence?
Applicant: Violence.
